Basically, EA Mythic is closing down the beta servers on October 10, 2007 and they won’t be reopened for pleasure until early December 2007. Not that I know what I’m missing because they forgot to email my beta invite, but I’ll bet it was everything I’ve dreamed it could be. And more!

I really picked the wrong day to give up heavy drinking.

Yesterday we removed several more people from the Beta for NDA violations. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, however secure you THINK the location you’re spilling your guts about Beta is, trust me, it isn’t. There’s always someone there who will turn you in for the slightest chance of getting into beta. And you know, from our point of view, that’s a great thing. Our numbers stay the same, one out, one in.

So if you get into the Beta, please keep in mind, it’s not only us that is out there scouring the web for NDA violations, it’s everyone else who isn’t in as well.

I’m not turning rat for a “slightest chance” to get into WO beta, but if that chance was 100%, I’d turn any one of you in and sleep with a shiv under my pillow.

Pre-launch Downtime: Tuesday, April 24 6:00AM Eastern

Apr 23, 2007 15:50 EST

Greetings everyone!

The LOTRO game servers will be brought down on Tuesday, April, 24th at 6:00 AM Eastern for a final bit of pre-launch maintenance and to remove the level cap in preparation for LOTRO to go live! We expect the downtime to last up to 4 hours, and look forward to seeing everyone in Middle-earth when the servers come back up! Thanks for playing!

Note: No additional patch notes anticipated for this downtime.

So ok then.

Sometime in the next 24 hours, the lights will go out on the Lord of the Rings Online beta and the switch will be thrown for the live version of the game.

I played in the closed beta several months ago, when the NDA was in place — I might have mentioned that before, I dunno — and the game then was … ok. Not terrible, but not particularly good either.

From my limited experience and observation, they’ve done a lot of work on this world since then. Looks polished enough to my eyes, but I’m not new to this either — I’ve learned not to expect perfection.

I chuckle when I hear (or read) that LOTRO is a World of Warcraft clone. I chuckle because doesn’t that mean the circle is now complete? LOTRO is a WoW clone, which is an EverQuest clone, which is a Dungeons & Dragons clone, which is a Lord of the Rings clone. Kinda. They’re all different, of course, but it’s still elves and orcs, dragons and swords.

In a few weeks, the first level 50s will appear in LOTRO and we’ll wonder HOW?? HOW?? and more importantly, WHY?? WHY?? There’ll be stories of bad manners and rumors of hacking. There’ll be arguments about which is the WORST server community (Brandywine, I hear), but all of the servers will be both horrible and pleasant. Mediocre comedians will /ooc for a Karazhan group or where to find Mankirk’s wife and we’ll all run to Rivendell to put our fingerprints on Elrond’s windows and highly polished floors, just because he seems the sort who would be really irritated by that.

If tomorrow will be your first exposure to Lord of the Rings Online, but not your first MMOG — fear not. Controls, game play, default bindings, bla bla, same as you’ve seen before.

Commenter Steven and a few emailers asked for a few quick-start tips, and I really don’t have any that would blow your dress up, but here’s a few things I learned early on:

1. Options » Chat — to turn off the profanity filter. If someone has a complaint, let’s hear it unfiltered.

2. You want to try the instruments. I know, I did. It’s expensive, I’d hold off until you were more stable economically, but if you must, you must.

3. Choose a crafting profession early. As almost all of the crafting options include a harvest option, you’ll want to start picking up twigs, rocks or broken pieces of pottery right away. If you’re not excited about crafting, choose Explorer — they get prospecting (mining) AND foresting (picking up twigs).

4. On your second character, you have the option to skip the first set of quests and arrive in the post-holocaust world with a basic set of items. I tried that once, because I’m all about taking the short route, but unless you can twink your fresh noob character, you’ll be somewhat undergeared and a little under level for post-holocaust living.

5. Just as in World of Warcraft (clone!), everyone that kills the quest mob gets completion credit, so don’t be shy about asking to join a fellowship, or, inviting everyone out at the quest area into a new fellowship. By the way, when the quest says you might want to bring friends (i.e. it’s a group quest), the quest text is usually right. Some could be done solo, especially after a few levels, but just invite others hanging around the quest area and be done with the damn thing. Repair costs, at this moment, are VERY expensive (sorry, guardians).

That’s the short list. Here’s a couple of longer lists of tips and tricks from the LOTRO forums:

Official Things I Wish I Knew Earlier!

I didn’t know you could do that!

And with that, it’s almost time for the party to start, so let the game begin.

And by “subdued”, I mean there’s not a whole lot of it. WoW is stuffed full of clever wisecracks and pop culture references — LOTRO is a rather sober environment. They can’t very well have Madonna on their loading screen, can they? The Tolkien crowd, fans and The Estate alike, would sue.

I imagine that’s one of the challenges in creating an online world for a franchise you don’t own outright — remaining suitably respectful of a creator’s world. Blizzard is free to create a brothel inside Karazhan (that Maiden is no maiden, bytheway); Turbine has to maintain a certain reverence — the orgasming women in Bree, a notable exception.

Which you will want to check out before they patch it. Seriously. Bree-Town Jail, with the guardian and captain, etc. trainers inside. Stand around for a few minutes and listen — there’s a woman (or women) having sex in there. Some very good sex too, by the sounds of it.

It’s actually a quirk of the audio track for human female crits and dodges, but I like to call it home. Could be, once word gets around, the Bree-Town jail will have more players stuffed inside than Strider’s room.

So, even though I would think it hilarious to give Elrond the surname Hubbard and have him wander the streets of Rivendell muttering about a mysterious spaceship arriving at any moment to whisk the elves into the west, there’s probably more people who wouldn’t think that was funny at all.

They’d be wrong, of course.

(Pictured: The Prancing Pony tavern of Lord of the Rings Online)

I know LOTRO and I are still on our honeymoon. I know I have the flush and the zeal of the newly converted, but, I AM SMITTEN.

I was swept off my feet. I wasn’t looking to make a big commitment — I just wanted a little fun on the side — and I have fallen hard for this game. Maybe you won’t love her like I do, and that’s ok, because she and I have something special right now. I don’t know if the end game will be as rich and carefree as our early days together have been, but if it is … I am so DOWN with this game.

I LOVE that there’s a “Pie-Eating Champion”.

(See? Hi, Cardinal Phang! You’re almost famous.)

I LOVE that I’m reading quest text now. I was a click-through questor from way back. Ya, ya, ya, we all have problems, Joe NPC, what do I need to kill/fetch/deliver? Now, I’m like: Brigands you say?? Stealing your weed, eh? THOSE BASTARDS! Sit tight, lil hobbit, I’m on the case.

I LOVE that the Old Forest is one of the spookiest in-game experiences I’ve ever had. I’m swatting flies, on my way to see a lady about some water, and the trees (elite ones, mind you) start creaking and moving. Thought me: I’m so dead, I’m so dead, I’m so dead, why didn’t I bring friends like the lippy NPC suggested?

I LOVE that the pre-order Founders’ in-game extra items are worth a damn.

I LOVE the area kill messages, or was killed by, as the case may be. Ok, I actually only LOVE the “was killed by” messages.

I LOVE the /music system where players can perform their own music with in-game instruments. I love that most of it is incredibly bad and that I would also be bad, but it’s depth and flavor.

I LOVE the crafting system, with farmers and foresters and scholars, although I’m not a crafter myself usually. I don’t know why we need pipe weed yet, but if I can blow dragon smoke-rings, call me a smoker.

I don’t even know all that I’ll love about my new mistress yet, but I’m eager to discover all the ways. Please GOD, let me love this game past level 20.

I can hardly wait to be with her again.

Those pre-ordering the game will be called Founders, and besides the title, Founders can play NOW and roll their de-noobified beta characters (level 15 cap) into live when they will enjoy founders subscription prices: $9.99 a month or $199 for a lifetime subscription. I like $9.99 a month ALOT; the $199, not so much. It’s not an unreasonable price, but I don’t have that kind of faith in anyone.

Box prices: $49.99 for the ordinary box, which includes two in-game items, or $59.99 for the collector’s edition, which includes a total of three in-game items plus nerd bait.

I played the LOTRO beta and thought it was a nice little game. The lore can’t be beat and unlike the Warcraft series, I actually know a thing or two about the backstory. There’s some problem with a ring and a would-be god, right?

Principally, it’s appeal is: NOT WORLD OF WARCRAFT.

(Hell, I would have played Vanguard if the hardware requirements weren’t so ridiculous. Still might, but I don’t feel like replacing my video card just yet. Vanguard is a game that needs to age in the barrel for a while, I think.)

I have noticed a very curious thing in Le World of Warcraft lately: enemies on my Friends List haven’t been logging on much in the last few weeks. (Unlike most players, the people on my Friends List are players I like to keep my eye on, lest I fall victim to a public chat channel ambush. It’s a long story.)

I’d like to hope they’ve given up on gaming, or are working on a blood elf character … on another server. Worst case scenario, they’ve moved on to LOTRO.

Which brings me to today’s online gaming lesson: In a new online game, when confronted with “aren’t you Soandso from WoW and/or EQ (etc)?”, deny, deny, deny. I like to throw in a little roleplaying to further confuse, because then they think: 1. the real Foton never roleplayed, I must be mistaken and 2. it’s a goddamn roleplayer, I have to get away from here.

You have to use the tools available to you, and if crazy is your only tool, work it.

IRVINE, Calif. — Blizzard Entertainment® today announced that the release date for World of Warcraft®: The Burning Crusadeâ„¢, the highly anticipated expansion for World of Warcraft, will be in January 2007. By adding a few extra weeks to the development cycle beyond its original target date, Blizzard will be able to extend the closed beta test and further refine the new content that will ship with the game.

“We appreciate the enthusiasm surrounding World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade, and we’re excited about putting the finishing touches on all of the new content,” said Mike Morhaime, president and cofounder of Blizzard Entertainment. “We feel confident that the extra time spent polishing the game will result in the high-quality experience that our players expect and deserve.”

Blizzard began the closed-beta phase of testing on World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade earlier this month. The January 2007 release window will allow extra time for current beta testers to participate in the final stages of development and continue providing valuable feedback.

Further information on specific worldwide release dates, pricing, and other details will be announced in the near future.

They need time to nerf a bunch of stuff. (Oh, I’m kidding!)

I’ve only run around in the beta a few days, but I haven’t noticed much of anything that’s buggy, broken or largely incomplete. Sure, there’s stuff to fix, didn’t seem like two additional months’ worth of work to me.

This expansion is really quite nice. That’s me being understated. I really mean, it’s incredible and worth skipping guild raids to play (not to mention skipping work, but that would be very irresponsible of you).

Archive of Media Alert

My one-screenshot review of the Blood Elf starting area: