So I mentioned that The Emo Tank left our guild a couple weeks ago. (Ya, I’m all broken up about it.) Here’s how it went down:

The Emo Tank had become increasingly unbearable: he was barking out orders in the warrior channel (when no officers were in the channel, of course); he was sending random tells to well-placed guild members asking for their reassurance and support and he was going wonky at the most inopportune moments — mid-Blackwing Lair clear, for instance.

Example: the one BWL clear, the raid leader makes some wisecrack about the tanks. We tittered. Emo-boy spends the next 20 minutes asking me in /tells what the RL meant by that. WTF. He meant nothing. A joke? Ever heard of them? Meanwhile, we’re yucking it up in officer chat channel because we’re assholes like that, but he had no way of knowing that.

How can I be sure? We would have heard him opening the razor package over Ventrilo.

So the one raid night, I’m offline. Some real life obligation, I don’t remember anymore, so I wasn’t witness to this. And I know exactly why Emo Tank chose that evening to wig out — no way in flaming Hell would I have stood for that shit and he knew/knows that. I’m not in charge of the trigger for the guild, but I have no qualms about ordering the assassination.

At any rate, they were flying to the raid zone when one of the officers noticed that Emo-head was still out in Winterspring, a far-flung WoW zone that is nowhere near any of the raid instances. The officer inquired when Emo-head would be departing to meet at the raid zone — they were a little tight on warriors, could use another. Emo-boy told the officer he was going to skip the raid and continue farming faction for his pussy mount. And I mean that literally, a cat mount, but pussy mount is more accurate.

Since Emo Tank was ranked as a guild Raider — including its accompanying privileges and perqs — openly skipping a scheduled guild raid is not an option. As I described another time, we have the two ranks: Raider and Non-raider. Completely voluntary which rank people would prefer, but if they want the privileges and benefits of being a Raider, then goddammit, if they’re online, they’re available to raid. That’s the responsibility part. Emo-boy knew all that, he was making a play.

Now all the officers were upset and pissed off. They asked one of the more-dedicated Raiders to log off her (we think it’s a her, could be wrong) priest and play her warrior for the raid. Now she’s pissed because her priest wanted something from the raid zone. Normally, we don’t hear a peep out of her in guild chat, except “ok” “thanks” and “good night everyone”, but when she saw that Emo wasn’t going to raid because he was working on pussy faction, she said something like “*Emo*, when a raid is called, Raiders are required to fly to the raid zone.”

By his reaction, you’d have thought she called him a dickless, skillless, brainless emo-sack. He just went berserk — she never listens to him about warrior strats, she doesn’t have the same level of play as the other warriors, she doesn’t whatever.

The officers fired a warning shot over his bow. Y’know, time to walk away and cool off, pal, before you’re on the outside looking in.

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