Category Archives: Noteworthy

We Need More Fluffers

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Skelly

In my neverending quest to assume secret identities, I become the undead.

This was part of a quest reward I completed recently: a drink with 5 charges that granted various illusions for ten minutes each. Other than the occasional uber equipment reward (read: extremely occasional), this reward was our favorite.

Our group (it’s not a party, dammit!) drank up and started to put the hurt on some dinos: one guy was 2 feet tall, the remaining four were skellies. This Horde rogue wandered past and did a virtual double-take. He passed, he stopped, he turned around and stared.

Through the magic of /em’s, he told us that he had been trying to say hello and ‘sup for the past few minutes until it dawned on him that all was not as it appeared. He seemed like a nice enough guy, for a Horde, even with the flesh dripping off his skeleton, so we allowed him to pass through Our Zone unmolested.

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I Can Violate Human Rights, Too

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I had some leftover quests to finish up before I could leave this Warcrack zone that I’ve grown to hate. I’ve been here so long, I’m on a first-name basis with the graveyard spirit.

Anyhow, I meet up with a couple of e-friends to finish these and we trot over to the target hunting grounds and begin whacking on some elite ogres. These were kill quests — the elite mobs were just under our own levels — so shouldn’t take long and we can finally, blissfully, kick the dust of that town off our boots.

While we’re a-whacking, along comes a lower-level paladin to do his own whacking. He asks in /say which quests we’re working on, and as we were engaged in group conversation at the time, we didn’t respond immediately.

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My 2005 MMOG Wishlist

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People like to make lists around the end of the year. We could make lists in March, but then people would be like, “Dude, what’s with the lists in March? You’re totally late.” While I don’t really give a ratfuck if people think I’m lazy, I just don’t have the energy to explain every little thing to them.

My MMOG Wishlist of things I will never see in gaming:

1. Customizable reply buttons. You know how it is. Some level 5 ratfucker runs around ninja-inviting everyone to his spanking new guild and some box pops up on your screen while you’re running to the travel portal “Ratfucker wishes to invite you to his guild, Dragon Ratfuckers of Power” Accept or Decline. I want to have my Decline button text customizable. I’d customize it to “WTF” or “Go Away”. Same goes for the ninja group invites. Is it too much to ask that they send a tell before inviting the entire zone to their whatever?

2. X-ed functioning. Sometimes a player will go so far in their asshattery that I X them. As far as I’m concerned, they don’t exist. I want my /ignore functioning to go that one step further. I don’t want to see their lame chat, I don’t want to see their character … I don’t want to even hear rumors of them. I want to run past their hunt area and see monsters spraying blood for no reason, apparently engaged in combat with some mystery player; OR BETTER STILL, the monster disengaging and returning to its spawn spot, regenning like mad because it has slain said mystery player. Enjoy the graveyard, invisible fucker.

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