Author Archives: Foton

Crap! It’s a Patch!

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There are few things that strike terror in a gamer’s heart quite like patch day.

Who’s gonna be the lucky one? And by “lucky”, I mean nerf.

All I’ll say is: HAHAHAHAHA, my already balanced (read: probably overpowered but I won’t admit that publically) class was enhanced. Blizzard, god love ’em, are such noobs.

Who in their right mind pushes a patch a few days before Christmas? Management either hates us all, including their own employees, or they are too fucking arrogant to check out how the other online gaming houses are working things.

And, whoever had the bright idea for the WoW peer-to-peer patch system: I hope Santa shits down your chimney.

Damn noobs.

Living Dead Girl

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I’ve been busy smoking the Warcrack lately; mostly trying to scratch out a living on the hard scrabble of a land they call “quest rewards”. Christ, would it kill the NPCs to put out a little more when I run all over the planet delivering their winky dink tomes and arcane knowledge? Foton’s toon has needs, man!

Since I’m not the type to update ye olde blogge with “Dear Diary: Today I killed a raptor. It was a close fight.”, there’s been no new material. Because, I think you deserve a little more for your IP access dollar. Or, rather, your employer’s IP access dollar.

Recently, the guild had another outting of a female toon. It’s not an uncommon situation: female avatar confesses that its driven by a male player … mayhem ensues when the male avatars express outrage … shemale avatar is forced out of the guild because our guild idiots were, apparently, whacking off to pixelated fantasies instead of FARMING PHAT LEWT like they were supposed to be.

Seemed plenty obvious to me, but I’m not a noob ’round these parts.

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Smoke It If You Got It

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If you’re fully attached to the Warcraft crackpipe, you probably spend hours scouring the web for tips and info (maybe cheats too) to enhance and streamline your grinding gaming experience. You have thottbot as your start page, DON’T YOU?!?!?!

You won’t find anything useful, or pertinent, here, junkie.

Although my days of scouring the web for MMOG spoilers and template planners are long over, I still enjoy skimming message boards for developing drama and posters that are (sometimes unintentionally) amusing.

Some WoW posts you might have missed:

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