Things I Hate

Things I Hate — March 2006 edition:

1. Podcasts. What the fuck. I can’t think of anything less desirable to have on my iPod than a podcast, no matter the subject. I’d rather listen to Hall & Oates Greatest Hits than some guy talking about how he killed a raptor last night in MMOG_08, plus he really likes Pulp Fiction.

2. My guild’s rogues. DKP-hoarding bastards, spend some of that DKP on the rotting rogue endgame armor instead of saving up for some Weapon of the Gods that drops .0001 percent of the time, according to Thottbot, which means it NEVER DROPS.

3. Any of my guildmates’ main characters that random on Ahn’Qiraj 20 or Zul Gurub equipment, icing out somebody else’s alt that isn’t allowed into Blackwing Lair. Jeezus, check the stats. It’s CRAP.

4. World of Warcraft name changes. Unless it’s some moronic name, knock off the name changes. Players are asking for name changes to ESCAPE their poor reputations and history (duh?) and Blizzard is HELPING THEM. Gold farmers, douchebags, ninjas, the cancer operation fakers are all getting name changes which makes it difficult to vote “HELL NO” when they re-app to our guild for the 6th time.

5. Voicechat Censors. Ya, I get that you don’t want your schoolage children hearing “F this”, “F that” and “F those c’suckers” blasting from your computer’s surround sound speakers. I don’t want them to hear that either. Headphones? Ever hear of those? Extra bonus points for everyone: no more annoying-ass echo on your end of the voicechat. It’s an adult guild in an adult game using adult exclamations; I can’t play Ventrilo policeman because you’re too damn cheap to buy headphones.

6. That bitchass Warcraft priest we finally forced out of the guild. She (and it was a she, hi Ventrilo) was only in the guild two weeks, but in that short period of time, she managed to stir up no less than 20 arguments OVER NOTHING, at least one per day. Example: on about her third day in the guild, she was upset that someone had jokingly asked for a recount on her husband’s guild app. Yawn? Example 2: she was upset that another guildmate had offered to buy the AQ20 spell upgrade she had won. “Is this how the guild operates?? Trying to buy spells off a guildmate that WON IT FAIR AND SQUARE??” Err, so? Maybe he offered because he noticed that you didn’t memorize (i.e. use) the spell right away, you stupid twat, which by the way, is DEFINITELY a guild violation. P.S. Enjoy the name change. (F’ing Blizzard)

7. The DKP Haters. WTF, how can you hate math? You show up, you eventually get loot, it’s that simple. DKP is merely a tool to keep track of who’s in line and their position in the line. My experience, the only players that hate DKP are those players that rarely show up for raids and want the Gods of /Random to save them from their shit-ass equipment. Please do not think I am fooled by your rant about how corrupt DKP systems are — math is not corrupt.

Also not fooling me: the “I want, I want, I want, but loot isn’t important to me” people, the DKP Cashouts (enjoy your new guild, and btw, you’ll be leaving sooner than you think with a rather large DKP balance), and the “I have all day to PvP and I have all I want from Molten Core, but I don’t have time to help clear MC anymore” people.

8. Oh ya, I also hate Molten Core. But I still show up to help clear.

9 thoughts on “Things I Hate

  1. Heh, everytime you rant about you guild it makes me wish I was in it. Apparently I’m as big of an asshole as you are. =)

  2. Prognosticator — And I only covered the first 8. I’m saving the next 20 for April and May.

    roXet — Sounds like you’d be officer material. You’re hired.

  3. 2. My guild’s rogues. DKP-hoarding bastards, spend some of that DKP on the rotting rogue endgame armor instead of saving up for some Weapon of the Gods that drops .0001 percent of the time, according to Thottbot, which means it NEVER DROPS.

    Fire those idiots. They are hurting the raid by letting stuff rot while pining after Bindings (I’m guessing that’s what a lot of them are after). Or, force the highest one to take and spend his points. That kind of behavior is just stupid.

    Oh, and did I mention I have a 60 Rogue somewhere I’d be glad to bring along? 😉

  4. “The DKP Haters. WTF, how can you hate math?”
    No, the problem is I *CAN* do the math.
    Math says I need to spend 3 months waiting in line while other people get their upgrades first.

    And in my experiance the only people that like DKP are the ones that use it to get their shit first. These are usually the people that never miss a raid. Hell, they only log in to raid. They also rank high on my /afk meter because they are watching movies and such. But hey, how else are you suppose to squeeze in quality time with the wife and not miss a single dkp point?

    Random is fine and fair, but leadership doesnt like fair. They like control, they like quiet.

    If you go on enough raids you’ll eventually get something using dkp or random. Random ensures a random loot distribution, dkp forms a waiting line.

    These lines are great too, wait 3 months to build up enough dkp to compete for items and your competition already has theirs. Youll finally get your shit, but then they begin stockpiling dkp so when new shit comes, they again get first dibs.

    Moreover, DKP slows down raid progression and demoralizes raid members.
    I watched my pants get sharded because I needed to save my dkp for a chance at the toep. When it did drop and I lost the roll (and thats fine, least i had a shot), but the pants just added insult to injury. Guild bank gets a shard, I keep my dkp for another day and my dps suffers.

    Also I hate my leadership making up rules about DKP as they go along and threatening to take it away whenever it suits their mood.

    Got my purples like a real man, rank 13 bitch.

  5. By your own admission, you weren’t showing up to raids. You don’t want to wait in line behind the people that did show up? This is an indictment of DKP systems how?

    Sounds like it’s working as intended.

  6. Preach it about DKP. There are several implementations out there, some better than others (zero sum fanboi here), but I absolutely LOVE the arguments against it.

    The classic
    1. You raided for 3 months without reward while I was still leveling up, it’s not fair that you should get an item first.

    On a similiar line of thought
    2. You contribute 10x as much to our guild’s raids, it’s not fair that you should get an item first (hi2u rob).

    One recently making a strong showing is
    3. I got 6/8 of my tier 1 set on a single raid because everything was defaulted to me, I’m being punished by having negative points because now I can’t compete on tier 2 items for AT LEAST a month.

    Almost everything that gets put out there under the pretense of saying DKP is not fair is either misunderstanding or just old-fashioned loot-whore-ism. If fair means having to wait your turn, then fair isn’t what you want.

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