Over the weekend, Guild Wars pushed out a few micro-mini patches. They never tell us what the patches are for, just that terse “new patch is available … GET OUT AND GET IT” message. Not that I need to know, but I’m a curious sort.
Anyhow, I know from the loyal Slashdot readers at AFK Gamer that the terse message means: get out and patch or continue to be annoyed by patch spam every few seconds.
Cool, a patch, thought I. Don’t get that every day in Warcraft, not even every month. heh.
Big problem — patch introduced this universal crash bug somethingorother … hard lockup whenever the character moves. So I rebooted, and headed over to the Guild Wars site to see what’s up and if there’s an ETA (there’s never an ETA, but it could happen someday in some game.) I hadn’t spent too much time exploring their site before, OBVIOUSLY, or else I would have known that they don’t have message boards, just some knowledge base.
Has anybody anywhere ever gotten a solid answer to their question in any knowledge base in under 30 minutes? Those systems have the worst fucking search function on the planet; it would be faster to google.
I know why some gaming houses choose not to run a message board system — I just think it’s horseshit. They may sponsor some “official” fansite to run a system that they’ll occasionally “officially” post on, but what the fuck ever, because everyone knows it’s just a budget decision and the perfect cover for dodging questions.
I found some “official” fansite boards, slower than hell of course, no one knew anything but we could all agree that everyone was crashing. Fast forward ten minutes, and two message board refreshes later, there’s a new patch and all is well again. Damn, that’s service. I didn’t even have to ask.
Which is comforting, because I understand they already got my money, and as soon as sales for boxes and expansions, and whatever else they’ll try to dig out of me, have dried up, they can close up shop and say, “we’ve moved on to other things, you should too” and that will be that.
I’ll tell you what I wish they’d patch in GW instead of whatever it is they are patching: the goddamn mob cons. I’m level 10 now and I still have to sweat it out when a small band of level 5s jump me. If a couple of those mobs are AE healers, cue the fat lady because it’s all over.
Now what the fuck is that? I have no idea what the mob levels in this game mean, but I suspect it means “this mob was born as a level 5 and has only grown in strength. Enjoy.”
I had a quest from my Master Trainer when I was level 8-ish, had to follow him around while he was hunting somethingorother. The Master is level 5 or 6, I’m thinking I’ll have to babysit his ass all over this godforsaken map until he’ll finally give me my due reward. How wrong I was. That little fucker kicked major ass, never ran short on mana (actually called energy in GW) — he’s spamming specials and soloing these nasty patrols of healers and casters.
And when I say solo, I mean I stood way the hell back while he did his thing. Got my reward, went on my way.
Later, on another quest, I ran into an even-con mob and I figured that I was in big trouble then — killed him easily. He barely dented my noob armor and dropped like a sack of dirt.
Glad he wasn’t a healer. I’d still be fighting him.