Happiness is a Warm Gun

My 14 year old nephew called the other night because he had a project due on the Vietnam War and wondered if I had any cool stories. (wtf) Allow me to explain. He had already quizzed his father, my OLDER brother, for interesting stories about hippies and protests and in-your-face photojournalism and had come up empty, as my OLDER brother was a small child in the ’70s.

(Ok, apparently, my nephew needs some tutoring in math.)

The best I could offer was a list of CDs with rocking Vietnam-era music, most of which he knew about already from … (wait for it, wait for it) … the Battlefield Vietnam soundtrack. Go figure. Fourteen year old kid knows all this crap about Vietnam from a game.

He knew about the Viet Cong, the popular weapons of the time, the terrain (jungle warfare — it sucks, man!), the fall of Saigon, even the Tet Offensive, which he googled on his own because he was curious. (Here’s a wiki link, noob, because I know you know almost nothing about it. heh, ok, I knew almost nothing about it.)

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No More Banana Bread for Me, Mom

I am a loot chest griefer. I make no apologies. I make no excuses. And, I intend to continue my life of chest griefery.

I wasn’t always such a poor example of a Warcraft citizen. I used to dutifully empty every loot chest, even the crap stuff like banana bread and wild hog shanks, but it’s been a long time since I was so conscientous.

My life of chest griefing began one day about two months ago when I was out at The Best Camp Ever in Burning Steppes. Nasty little hellhole, the Steppes, but it was ideal for a mature rogue like me in need of some major cash: squishy casters and a few melee mobs sprinkled around to keep it interesting.

My modus operandi: pick their pockets, then rock their orcish world. As a bonus, every 20 to 30 minutes a chest would spawn in one of four positions. And, there’s more! About once a day, a named mob would spawn to check up on his camp and he would get the same treatment as his lesser brethren. Usually, he had a rare or epic loot on his dead body.

Yes, it was heaven on Azeroth.

Then the professional farmers got squeezed out of Azshara and the Scarlet Monastery — a dynamic virtual world with a changing economy (that old chestnut) — and soon thereafter, they discovered The Best Camp Ever.

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