Stop Wasting My Bandwidth

Ya, this is just the sort of winky dinky roleplaying crap I want to waste my time reading.

I’m looking for game INFORMATION, maybe a juicy flame or twenty, not Barney the Purple Dinosaur “I found my love on the Internet, imagine that!” bullshit.

Put a warning on that crap if you’re going to post it.

SWOYT — shameless waste of your time.


Acronyms are a curious by-product of internet life.  Like all inventions, they grew from a need — in this case, a need to communicate faster and with less keystrokes than typing allows.  The generic acronyms are well known:  lol, lmao, lmfao (the highest form of laughter, almost requiring surgery to attach your fucking ass back on), brb, etc.

Online gaming created its own set of acronyms.  We needed standard acronyms to communicate quickly when a_ghoul_bat_lord01 was beating our virtual ass down, as opposed to needing acronyms for “what’s your a/s/l, ChickWithADick?”. 

With the advent of gaming voice systems, the wonderful world of gaming acronyms is in danger of becoming extinct.  Thanks to Team Speak, there are even some noobs in my SWG guild that don’t even KNOW some of the standard gaming acronyms — it’s hell on a PVP raid when the Team Speak server goes whacky and we have to actually *GASP* type.

Frankly, if you don’t know what inc, mezz, rezz, wtb, wts, wta, lfg or exp is, I don’t have time to explain it to you.  And I don’t want you in my group either, noob.  I can write up a short list of the more “evolved” acronyms, however.  Most of these are indigenous to advanced End Game-type gaming … although quite a few were created by my buds and me to entertain ourselves, they had the added bonus of pissing off GWH.  (Guildleaders we hate)

MT/MA/SA – Main Tank, Main Assist, Secondary Assist.  duh.

MC – Main Cleric – in charge of leading the complete heal chain, also the guy to yell at, with cursing acronyms, if the raid fails.

RL – Raid Leader – the guy to yell at about the choice of targets for the evening’s raid.  Also could mean Real Life … important to know the context of the RL use.

w/e – whatever – usually used to respond to an insult you receive.  u r a mfjb.  w/e.  (a better comeback to an insult, my current favorite … wfe.)

Which leads into a whole other category of acronyms, the cursing ones, the insult ones, acronyms to flame with:

WTH/WTF – What the hell!  and What the F-bomb!  Pretty much any acronym with an F, is an F-bomb.  Apply liberally, it’s more fun that way.

OMFG – The more “mature” way to say Oh My God!  Mature as in, I’ve seen an R movie, I know that everyone talks this way.

STFU – Shut the F up.  The Classic, usually the opener for any flame war.

ffs – For fuck’s sake.  We once had an entire raid where we used ffs in every sentence.  O those were the days!  ffs, we done yet?  where’s the f’ing clerics, ffs?  ffs, who’s in charge?  ffs, we need more lewt!  ffs, inc yet?  ffs, inc.

bft – ‘Bout fucking time (you showed up in the zone, we’ve been waiting 4fe)

4fe – for-fucking-ever aka a really long time, you asshat.

CSW/CSH – c**k-sucking whore or, if you like to think you’re more ghet-toe, use c**k-sucking ho.  Also can be used to mean crack-smoking whore/ho, and, recently, CSD has come into some popularity.  (crack-smoking developer)

MF(insert your own noun) – anything with MF obviously refers to the Big One, the Bomb above all F-bombs, Mother-F’er/ing.  Examples:  MFC (don’t ask), MFP (don’t ask), MFAH (asshole).

IFHVT – I f’ing hate Vex Thal, invented during an EQ Vex Thal raid, jfc, do I have to explain everything?!?!

jfc – Jesus (f-bomb) Christ!  Another exclamation of dismay, this one with a little more punch.

OMRFS – Our monk really f’ing sucks.  Again, Vex Thal, duh!  (no, he never did figure it out.)

When it comes to gaming acronyms, the potential to be creative AND to annoy others around you is endless.  A little side benefit, you cannot be banned for using acronyms.  After all, you could have been saying What the Fizzle.

P.S.  A4TW = Acronyms For The Win, noob.

You Can’t Go Home Again

Although it shames me to admit it, I logged back onto EQ_Character03 after a year’s absence just to have a look around. As God is my witness, that was my original plan. Just a look. Honest.

After the monkey tried to crawl on my back and I toyed with the crack pipe in my mouth, I wondered “WHAT COULD I HAVE BEEN THINKING?” For crissakes, I wasn’t even DRUNK.

Now, I realize that I’ve missed two expansions (I haven’t actually *missed* them), and I didn’t complete a lot of the content on EQ_Char03 that I should have, but jfc, I’m so woefully behind even the noobs, it’s as if I never played at all. If I had waited to take a peek after Omens of War is released, I’d be five levels of grinding yumminess behind too.

Just a sample of the problems re:  a year-long EQ vacation:

A.  I don’t even know what some of these spells are that noobs are begging for nowadays.  They think I’m being an ass, which I usually am, but in this rare instance, I am innocent.

B.  I’m broke.  EQ’s economy has always been vastly different from other MMOGs that have manufactured money, vis-a-vis mission payouts, but EQ_Char03 seriously could use some social services for the destitute (me).  EQ_Char03 has needs, man!

C.  I’ve spent two hours “looking around” and so far, all I’ve done is set up my hotkeys again, redid my interface to something not quite so mid-1990s, and somewhat relearned my current spell set.  Do you see killing mobs or making money in there anywhere?  Exactly.

D.  New acronyms that have been invented in my absence.  LDoN, LFA, Trib this ya shiatz mahn, need temp, etc.  WHAT IN THE HELL IS ALL THAT?  And, who could I possibly ask without looking like a hot-off-the-blocks eBay noob?  (Which I kinda am … only without the eBay.)

The next time I’m not drunk and wishing I was, maybe I’ll have five hours to read up on all the content I missed. 

Not that I really “missed” it.