No Holds Bard

April 1, 2008 by at 10:40 am • Filed Under Etc. 
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World of Warcraft- The Molten Core

I hate most of the internet April Foolery because it’s so not funny, but I have to admit the World of Warcraft Bard Hero and Molten Core for Consoles pranks are pretty damn humorous.

Funnier still, the posts on the General Forums with “Bard? WTF?”


52 Responses to “No Holds Bard”

  1. funcro on April 1st, 2008 6:34 pm

    I’d resub in a heartbeat to play a Bard Hero.

  2. Quzor on April 2nd, 2008 12:08 am

    I have to admit, they had me going for a second on that Bard class. The thought process was something to the effect of:
    “…the power of rock? WTF? And Guitar Hero integration now!?! What the hell is go–oh, well played Blizzard!”

    As for the Molten Core console game, I was really hoping that would be a real thing. I knew right away that it wasn’t, but I think that would be a cool idea; if there was a way to effectively execute it (which there’s not), market it (also not), and give it some replay value (pff…even the dungeon lost its appeal almost immediately). Then I found myself wondering “hmm…why didn’t they include all those other bosses we’ve learned to love to hate?”

    Ah well, I have to agree. This was one of the better (ok, it was the best) April Fool’s pranks on the web this year. The coup de gras; people on my server actually believed it; “When is the Molten Core game coming out!?!”
    “Man, I can’t wait to play Bard class!!”
    “What!?! It’s not real?!? Aww, man…”
    Never have I seen so many noobs coalesce into one big blob of fail.

  3. The Dude on April 2nd, 2008 2:27 am

    Hell… why is it that the “Bard Hero” appeals much more to me than that Emo Death Knight concept?

  4. Indy on April 2nd, 2008 6:12 am

    Dude, it’s not the Death Knight that’s emo, it’s some of the players. I’ll grant you, the emo players don’t have much appeal to me either…

  5. q on April 2nd, 2008 10:22 am

    The concept arts for MC’s finest are gorgeous.

  6. celerie on April 2nd, 2008 2:25 pm

    i generally love the well thought out april fool’s jokes. i fricking HATE the giant spam of “i’m wowquitting! … hahah april fool’s!” omg. be creative or just stfu imo.

  7. Dimble on April 3rd, 2008 2:23 am
  8. Toms on April 8th, 2008 6:34 pm

    No! You’re just encouraging them!

  9. celerie on April 14th, 2008 9:57 am

    two weeks.
    /foot tap

  10. Kaijn on April 15th, 2008 9:40 am

    Bet he’s on a holiday again, leave us with the shakes 😐
    Geif foton fix, soon!

  11. bizz on April 18th, 2008 3:30 am

    Gief FOTON plx!! GIEF!! i want more incredible stories!!

  12. Missy65 on April 23rd, 2008 6:32 pm

    Do u guys play in thhe game?..Or just chatting?

  13. bonedead on April 24th, 2008 6:53 am


  14. Kaijn on April 26th, 2008 12:45 am

    Yeah, all I do is play, its not like im here every 2.nd day to check if my hero stirrs ..

  15. jcd on April 26th, 2008 3:24 pm

    He’s probably just AFK, he’ll be back with a soda soon.

  16. Annalyze on April 26th, 2008 10:01 pm

    Can we kick this rogue from the group? He’s been AFK awhile now =P

  17. celerie on April 27th, 2008 3:00 pm

    fouuuurrrr weeeeeeeks ohhhhh emmmm geeeeeee

  18. wowpanda on May 1st, 2008 1:44 pm

    LOL Annalyze, that was funny!

  19. Marlowe on May 3rd, 2008 2:06 pm

    Good god, Foton…update or take down.

  20. wowpanda on May 6th, 2008 9:11 am

    Call 911! he is MINA (Missing in NO Action)!

  21. Laura on May 7th, 2008 9:27 am

    Personally, I think he does it just to watch you guys go crazy…. or maybe an AoC vacation is in the making?

  22. q on May 11th, 2008 6:51 pm

    Why AoC ? It’s a shallow as it looks good.

    And it doesn’t even look that good.

  23. bizz on May 12th, 2008 10:56 am

    LFM healer and tank for raidquest “search of foton” in sunwell. (he’s prolly lost in there or something)

  24. hkedi on May 14th, 2008 2:48 pm

    Foton the AFK Gamer…………

    is AFK…….

  25. Annalyze on May 16th, 2008 10:19 pm

    I am so not checking this site daily any longer…bi-weekly at most now =P

  26. celerie on May 18th, 2008 6:40 am

    this is his longest afk ever huh? the one after xmas only lasted a month iirc.

  27. Bonedead on May 18th, 2008 5:29 pm

    oh well. he’ll be back sometime.

  28. Jiffy on May 19th, 2008 7:39 pm

    Even Scott (Lum) managed to squeeze some updates in. For shame!

  29. wowpanda on May 22nd, 2008 8:34 am

    Even Amber is up and running.

  30. Jiffy on May 23rd, 2008 8:08 pm

    Dude, even Cosmik updated. Multiple times. Cosmik. :)

  31. Cosmik on May 27th, 2008 11:42 am

    Hey! I resemble that remark!

  32. bizz on May 29th, 2008 1:38 am

    omg there is even spam now!!

    i think foton is going for a record here

  33. Oz on June 4th, 2008 8:39 am

    Game over man, just game over!

  34. Laura on June 5th, 2008 5:46 am

    Well, if this is that inevitable end already – Thanks for all the years of blogging, Foton. As psycho as raiding guilds can be, it is a blast and it was a blast reading about your (mis)adventures.

  35. Acidbrns on June 8th, 2008 2:09 pm

    *Queue sad music from Titanic*

    Here’s a thought though, anyone remember what server he plays/ed on? Could always hop on there and /who Foton see if it works.

  36. Laura on June 10th, 2008 12:13 pm

    I don’t think his character is named Foton. He goes for anonymity. Wonder if Raster is still about to give us an update? Ah well just sucks to lose a good read.

  37. Bonedead on June 10th, 2008 12:32 pm

    People, people…. Calm down. Mr. Foton cannot simply wave his magic wang and create juicy guild drama (just other juicy things) for us all to love to read. Be patient, another asshat will come into the Foton crosshairs, it just might be a few years.

    Bai2u budday, if you’re really gone

  38. joeblow on June 12th, 2008 9:44 pm

    His stories were crap anyway. Taking this one off my list of bookmarks.

  39. batgrl on June 13th, 2008 2:27 pm

    Hmmm. I just feel sure he’s out there trying Conan. And that he’ll not be able to pass up the WotLK expansion when it hits. But there’s SO much fodder in Conan to blog on, which makes me curious as to where he’s lurking…

  40. Acidbrns on June 15th, 2008 1:38 pm

    Are you implying that perhaps he’s blogging about the tools in Conan elsewhere? Perish the thought! I don’t think he’d leave us here, if he was blogging about the entertaining recepticles in Conan i’m sure he’d be doing it here =(

  41. Bonedead on June 20th, 2008 4:09 am

    Okay now you know he is kind of there, I mean, he payed his hosting bill lol.

  42. Gemma on June 20th, 2008 4:32 pm

    I bet direct debit ftw :p

  43. Bonedead on June 21st, 2008 4:20 am

    This page was down for a day or so, I thought direct debit was, well, direct.

  44. Marlowe on June 22nd, 2008 6:59 am

    “He’s dead, Jim”

  45. batgrl on June 24th, 2008 3:45 pm

    “Are you implying that perhaps he’s blogging about the tools in Conan elsewhere?”

    No no, I just thought he started playing Conan and then got…lost in the excitement of note taking? Got sucked into the PvP no holds bar’d server there? Eaten by a mammoth maybe?

    Randomly now I hope he’s ok and didn’t get into some kind of messy real life thing involving the inability to blog. Hey, it happens sometimes.

  46. zupa on July 1st, 2008 6:30 am

    Thanks for all the laughs,

    come back soon :)

  47. temp on July 11th, 2008 11:26 am

    now… His name is… Robert Paulson
    His name is Robert Paulson

  48. Oz on July 18th, 2008 12:01 pm

    He’s actually Pinky??!? Holy monkeys, Batman!

  49. Aerie Peak on July 25th, 2008 3:19 pm

    And for the record, if I did squeak into a beta, I’d keep my fool mouth shut on the blog, especially if I hated the game. I would remain UNCHARACTERISTICALLY silent. *nudge nudge* Fair is fair, their house, their rules.


    Could it be WotLK isnt all were hoping for?

  50. q on July 27th, 2008 12:05 pm

    Most probably WAR, since it’s pretty much awful, unlike everything they said it would be :/

  51. q on August 12th, 2008 1:21 pm

    Well if i’m right, we should hear about Foton soon enough. The beta starts something like next week, and the game will be out in what, 35 days ?

  52. Bojan on July 30th, 2009 5:05 am

    Man, i miss that guy…


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