Congrats Douchebag!

August 15, 2007 by at 6:07 am • Filed Under Etc., Noteworthy 
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I’d like to create a line of gaming greeting cards. There’s a real market for this!

Congrats Douchebag

Here’s just some of the possibilities:

The douchebag card line – congrats on avoiding a game ban, selling gold for $$$, making everyone’s /ignore list (except for the characters created in the last hour), pulling off a loot and scoot on UberGuild03. Plus, the classics: the loot ninja, the loot whore and turning cyber tricks for loot.

The whole imaginary love scene – congrats on imaginary girlfriend, imaginary fiance, imaginary wedding, the new cyber partner. Also, good luck on keeping it from the real wife (especially after she sees the greeting card in your email/guild boards.)

Just for your guildmates (or your rival guild’s members) – congrats on the promotion for no pay, repeated failing of a gear check (or intell check) mob, proving that human evolution is a myth, also, congrats on the /gkick, the guild hop, or guild poaching.

The key is authenticity. It’s not enough anymore to have a 1950s photo of a guy drinking a cup of shut the fuck up, the market needs authentic-looking flamebait with focused messages.

Even in my free time, I’m thinking of improved methods to best the internet other guy.



Comments

6 Responses to “Congrats Douchebag!”

  1. Lono on August 15th, 2007 6:21 am

    Wish I had that one:

    “Sorry to hear about your sickness…

    Too bad you haven’t really got cancer.”

  2. Cyndre on August 15th, 2007 6:23 am

    Also of great potenial is the Repentant E-Thug Line:

    -Sorry I threatened to shoot your internets off ;-(

    -Sorry I /spit on you 🙁

    -So sorry for threatening to rape your face ;-(

    …and last but certainly not least, the classic UO Repentant E-Thug card:

    -So sorry I chopped up your corpse, stole your house and tea-bagged you… twice. ;-(

  3. Heather on August 15th, 2007 9:54 am

    I think there’s some real possibilities here, Foton. Go set up your own e-card site. You know we’ll go crazy with it. 😉

  4. Indy on August 15th, 2007 11:17 am

    Keylogger.

  5. Docmdnite on August 16th, 2007 11:04 pm

    Sorry your account got hacked…like my new epic flying mount?

  6. Lassirra on August 17th, 2007 3:50 am

    I would certainly give a project like this my full, non-financial support.

    “Sorry I ganked you. /hug” Preferably with the seduction hearts in the picture. Even better if the card came from a warlock.

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