You will never get this one, or at least it will remain unsolved for a few hours. Maybe.
No Lord of the Rings Online screenshot this week — I haven’t been able to escape the WoW guild for a few weeks.
It’s a long story.
Ok, I’ll tell you one of the stories, not the BIG story, but one of the stories that amuses me a great deal lately.
There’s this guildmate of mine — female, confirmed via Ventrilo ONCE. She’s a quieter sort, rarely types in /guild chat, and as I said, she’s only spoken on Ventrilo in my presence once. She talks to other people on Ventrilo quite a bit and speaks to other guildmates in /gu occasionally. Never to me, however.
I’ve been living this life for a few decades so I get the impression this woman does not care for me or my personality. As hard as this would be for my mom to believe, there are people on this Earth who do not care for me. I’m cool with that.
We still have to work together, however, being guildmates and all. Guildmates of the same CLASS, I might add, therefore, we sometimes have to coordinate our responsibilities for raids. I’ll send a /tell asking if she would prefer to be in charge of Responsibility X or Responsibility Y and she’ll say … nothing. No response at all. I’m not on /ignore (yet, heh), she just won’t answer me. Ever.
Anyways, I’ve learned to work around this and raid life has moved forward.
Oh. Did I mention that she always has an in-guild boyfriend? Over the past year and a half she’s gone through four or more in-guild boyfriends. That’s an additional challenge of being guilded with her — there’s always some dude ready to take up her torch if there’s ever a problem. I’ve tried talking to the some dude to get answers about raid coordination or if they want to PVP with the guild group, etc., but there’s always this long pause while the dude consults with her and by the time the dude gets back to me, the boss is engaged so who the fuck cares now?
My guild uses a DKP system for the primo loot, but much of the marginal-upgrade loot is left to /random, because who has the energy anymore to maintain DKP for every little thing. Not us. So we /random out a lot of the not-quite crap loot. And as we’ve worked through some of the loot zones, there’s been occasions where two pieces of not-quite crap loot for our class drops and I’ll defer on some of the stuff or if I win the /random on one piece, I’ll defer on the second — as is appropriate between guildmembers.
Or, in our class chat channel, we discuss among ourselves which loot items we really want and which pieces we’ll let others take first. (Not her, of course, because I’m in the chat channel.) We’re all loot whores by virtue of human nature, but we’re trying to keep it under control. Since I have no fucking idea which pieces she wants, I’ll send a /tell to her saying something like, “Since I won that ring (or whatever), I won’t roll on the trinket (or whatever) if you want it.”
Then the entire raid sits around for 10 minutes because no one knows what’s happening with the second loot item. No lie. The loot master will ask if anyone is going to take that. He’ll ask me directly, I’ll say I told her to take it. He’ll ask her directly, he’ll ask the some dude directly — no one knows whatever will become of the last loot item because she won’t answer until she’s damn good and ready. Y’know, WTF.
The incident in question — a weapon dropped. A very good weapon, in fact, and better still, this bad boy is not locked down with DKP — it’s free to whoever gets the best /random. She /randomed poorly. I /randomed not so poorly. i.e. I win. I can hardly wait to try that nasty out on some Player v. Player. The guild congratulated my dice. I thanked the guild. And I waited for the weapon to be put in my inventory. And I waited. And waited. And waited.
Obviously there’s a problem and obviously it’s her. I assumed (correctly) that some dude was taking up her torch with the loot master and the shit and the fan are waiting in the wings to meet.
Finally, the weapon was put in my inventory and the second not-quite crap loot is open for /random, also for our class. I said in raid chat that I wouldn’t roll on the second piece and that she could have if she wanted. Her answer? She left the raid and hearthed from the zone, mid-raid.
So … that’s a no?
We finished the raid without her, all the while Some Dude is taking up her case of maltreatment at my hands with the loot master. And then later, while restocking in Shattrath, Some Dude is still pleading her case with the loot master. I am blissfully left out of the arguments, although I am amused.
The next day, the loot master asked if I could speak with Some Dude and try to resolve this, for the sake of guild tranquility. Because, by now, everyone knows she’s upset, or in tears, or what-the-fuck ever. I am blissfully unaware as they don’t speak to me. Ever.
I agreed. So I sent a /tell to Some Dude and asked if we could talk about this and work it out or I could talk to her, either way. Here’s him, after a ten-minute pause to consult with her offline because she didn’t log on that night in protest: I’m sure you know what’s going on and I have nothing to add to that.
Ok, pussy. (That’s what I wanted to say. I really just said Ok and went about my business.) Hey, I tried.
After that night’s raid, she logged on and the loot master asked me to talk to her directly — give it another try. So I did, can we talk about this, somehow work this out?
No answer. After 15 minutes, I tried again, similar self-humiliation type /tell, is there some way we can work this out or you can tell me what the problem is?
No answer. She sat in Shattrath for over an hour and she must have been very busy because she never answered.
I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking I’m about to have a lot of fun with this situation.