Monthly Archives: September 2006

Where in the World of Warcraft?

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So you think you know World of Warcraft. You’ve been everywhere, done just about everything? Prove it.

Where in the World of Warcraft

Where in the world were the above screenshots taken?

Numbers 2 and 14 are particularly tough, as they lack landmarks — I’ll give hints: #2 was taken while returning to Ironforge and #14 was taken while fishing some of the best Warcraft waters for high-end fish. If your guild isn’t a 40-man raiding guild, or isn’t very far along in the content, there’s a couple others that might be difficult.

(Some of the shots you should be able to pinpoint the exact location, for others, just the zone may be distinguishable.)

There’s no grades, no prizes, this is just for sport.

The correct answers are after the jump. (There is a way to cheat using the AFK Gamer Flickr photostream, but keep your cheating, exploiting hacks to yourself.)

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PVP Relations

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As I said before, I’m really enjoying the cross-server PVP battlegrounds in Warcraft. It’s not so much the fast and furious queues as the constant arguments. I was even ditching guild raids for a time so I could PVP — while on the DKP waiting list mind you — and watch some more x-server arguments.

Sometimes, the x-server battlegroup mates will come to our realm forums to continue the arguments or to share screenshots of us losing a battleground miserably. I really wonder what’s the purpose of that — we’re not running around saying we never lose … far from it. We sometimes lose in a most spectacular way. I recall at least two times on Friday night when our server PVP raid could not hold the Arathi Basin stables for love nor money. Certainly, Arathi Basin can be won by the Alliance without the stables, but it’s a point of pride with me.

Speaking of Friday night and that server PVP raid group, I was ninja invited into the raid by a guildmate and I, in turn, ninja invited Raidleader into the raid. Immediately, we noticed that BabbleOn (she of prior weeks’ story — Part I and Part II) was leading this PVP hoe-down. It was hard to miss — she kept spamming her own Ventrilo information for people to join.

(Ya. No fucking way.)

Anyhow, we were having a conversation in /bg chat about some assbag shaman that wanted to die by our hands, repeatedly, when she said something like: what in the hell are you guys talking about? She must have looked at the raid roster because then she said: Oh. People on my ignore list are in here.

I just love gaming moments like that. We left soon after because more guildmates wanted to join in and she had a waitlist for the raid or some bullshit, and also … we were laughing so hard about the ignore list and the new titles she granted us (Raidleader the Fucker and Foton the Asshole), that we were completely useless for PVP.

I was really hoping that she’d scream (or ALL CAPS) “I’ll fucking kill you” because that’s a personal gaming goal of mine — to have someone scream “I’ll fucking kill you” and mean it — but no luck on that. I truly believe I came close this time, however.

Anyways, I’ve been collecting some x-server screenies to share:

May Your Children Strangle You

That was one guy yelling at another guy who didn’t tap the flag in Arathi Basin. Seems to me that “useless/worthless prick” is a very underrated insult. I’m going to add this to my regular rotation of PVP insults directed towards teammates.

Learn to Heal

Here’s another guy upset about the quality of healing in the PVP battlegrounds but he really fell short on his insult. I have a feeling that kids nowadays don’t even blink when their parents get divorced. Isn’t it more like “what took you guys so long?” rather than “GOD NO!! WHY?? WHY?? Is it me? It’s me, isn’t it?”

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Your Guild is a Quagmire

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People ask me all the time, “Foton, how do I find a guild as full of drama, pathos and misadventure as yours?” Naturally, my first reaction is: WTF? Who uses the word “pathos” in everyday speech? My second response is this: if you’re guilded, you already belong to one.

If you’re not hearing the good stories that your own guild is creating, ev-er-y gaming day, that’s because you’re not hooked up like I am. You have to find that one guy (or gal) who hears all the good stories — he (or she) is your guild’s gossip hag. Our gossip hag is a 16 year old warrior who talks to 90 percent of our servermates regularly. He also stays in touch with former guildmembers, which is something I don’t do because once someone leaves our happy family, they cease to be my problem.

The second hookup you’ll need is either your guildleader or a high-ranking guild officer. They’ll know all the inside dirt that isn’t shared with the general guild populace, like who’s about to get booted from the guild and for which infractions. (Is it cyber?? It’s cyber isn’t it?? I just know it’s cyber, that guy is such a man-ho.)

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking it would be easier to get the good stories by befriending the drama queens … go straight to the source, so to speak. This is INADVISABLE. Inevitably, you’ll get pulled into the drama and then suddenly, you ARE the drama. This will be you: how the hell did I become the drama, what just happened there? You were lying down with dogs and woke up with fleas, dumass.

This is why your guild hookups are so important. They’re the buffer between you (interested listener) and them (the drama queens, emo guildmates, and whathaveyous). They listen, they extract, they pass it on! They’re taking all the risk, you’re getting 100% of the entertainment. You can see the beauty here.

Take care of your contacts. Cultivate them. Shower them with kisses! The kind of entertainment they provide, you cannot buy, my friend.